Hold on, not that one.
There we go.
He’s green! He’s mean! …he’s green.
It’s time for another exciting boss battle! This one stars Santaur the Terrible, who’s basically Santa Claus, with his luxurious beard and the fact that he’s super thicc. He even comes with his own elves. With this much evidence, you’d have to have 0 IQ to not believe in Santa at this point!
Wait, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, the boss battle. Santaur is a self-breeding fat guy. For a human female, it will take an average of 39 weeks to conceive a child. Santaur, however, will force you to experience the miracle of life every turn. His spawn are 2/3 Celerity minions that, after you slaughter them, will deem you nice enough to receive a wonderful present. And because this boss battle will end before 2019, each present is guaranteed to contain Q4 content!
What kind of Q4 content you ask? Well, it all depends if you’ve been naughty or nice. You could get something nice like a cute little mistletoe OR Santaur could give you a big lump of coal and make you cry. Remember, he knows when you’re sleeping, so you better be good! Hold on, that’s kinda creepy. I suddenly feel less safe knowing this guy stares at me while I sleep. If you suspect that Santaur is watching you sleep, contact the police immediately!
Besides all that, Santaur just wants to spread some holiday joy. He’ll just summon some frosty minions, and sometimes, he’ll let his reindeer out to play.
If you can overcome Santaur’s mighty holiday spirit, you will earn additional Q4 content in the form of a Boss Crate. In it contains a spirit orb, and spirit duplicates of cosmetics you already have. It’s the season of giving, so will you all please give a crap about this boss? It would make me a happy panda.
Happy holidays!