yeah, but just imagine it. just, feel the stupidness. let it flow through you, and embrace it.
Miguel's Miscellaneous Memes
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“I don’t like bumps. They’re coarse and rough and irritating and they get everywhere.”
-Zanakin Starstrider
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what happened to you. where is the abyss thread
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Heyy I’ve been gone like 1 full day 
I mostly lurk around anyway, my deck creation process is quite slow at this point and I have no plans for Abyss currently due to lack of new content (I’ve seriously played every major and minor archetype there is at this point). The Abyss thread (as well as this one) is fine with bumps every 8-10 days since threads in decklists only get locked after two weeks.
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KoP I: Pooping Is Healthy for U
This deck is not overall very memetastic, but it’s what I’ve been using to get into Vet recently so I figured I’d post it anyway. Those who have followed my Starhorn and Aggro Cass decks know that part of my deckbuilding philosophy is turning overtuned cards into support for fun strategies. Fault is a very potential card for this kind of thang, and hence I present a new series called “Kingdom of Poops” (KoP) where in the future I aim to utilize some bit more gimmicky strategies supported by the ever-so-stupid Fault package. Hey, Vet is basically all poop now anyway in its essence 
As for the current deck, it boasts tons of healing that helps it to get to lategame where Fault, Inner Oasis and Golems make your board basically infinite. 1-off Nosh-Rak can help in some dragged out games, while Aymara is a real mvp that’s not usually expected. Purgatos is a good removal target that helps clear the way for Aymara, or gives tons of value when ignored. Otherwise nothing so special here this time, so peace & Miguel out 
WR was 16-4 (80 %) in Gold and Diamond.
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Astral Trip
K I guess I’m the calculator guy now 
Playing these decks is fun, and they do ok enough on ladder so I thought once again why not. Here’s the Vet edition of my Calculator-pet package combo: While Vetruvian battle pet package with Pax and Rae is generally bad in terms of giving Calculator stats, Zirix’s bag of tricks gives a very neat swarm approach to the deck with Inner Oasis and First Wish providing both cycle and longevity to your board. This makes the deck’s secondary wincon of overwhelming the opponent with a constant wave of pets slightly more viable. Astral Flood also gives the deck longevity and together with Oasis can occasionally lead to pretty absurd board states, although the problem of drawing said Raes and Pax’s just feels so bad.
Removal department does pretty good with just BoA and Sandswirl, while the deck’s combo piece Astral Phasing (obviously meant for bringing a gigalomantic Calculator straight to teh face) can also be used as a removal in desperate situations. I had one hilarious game where a Phased Golden Mantella kept removing the enemy stuff for huge value, bouncing and flying around the board.
Pretty much everything else about this deck has been said in my other Calc decks. Ask away Generally you bring up huge Calcs, see if they stick and try to sustain with Rawr and other pets + buffs for a big board advantage.
WR was 8-7 (53 %) in Diamond. I had pretty bad draws in many games only drawing my first Calculator around 5-6 mana, so considering that it’s not too bad 
Edit: Oh, and about the name: the deck has 2 cards named Astral, and playing against it probably feels like falling a bit outside what is considered normal reality (=random funny-looking and weird animals that just keep swarming around you and attacking).
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noice. where is the budget tho REEEEEEEEE
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Reading comprehension ez
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Notion of Endless rng
This deck is actually pretty much beyond my skill level (as I have very little experience with Sajj and even less with NoSE), but I’ll try to explain the basics anyway:
The basic trick is that we’re playing NoSE without artifacts. Wait wut? That means, we generate our artifacts with spells and minions. Wind Striker, Grincher and Autarch’s are the main means for generating artifacts, while Skyppy, Metalmeld, Oserix and Reliquarian provide support and are especially good towards the endgame. Between all the rng of Grinch and Skyppy and the Y’Kirs and Spinecleaver + Hexblades you pull yourself, we specialize in bringing in deadly combos to either create a heck of a pressure or to finish the opponent off straight away. Also a swarm gameplan with Exhuming Sands and things like Skywind Glaives or Furor Chakram are possible depending on what the rng provides.
Tracer and Incinera are super important to get to the opposite side of the board. They provide a little bit of board presence, and make it so that you don’t need to rely on clunky Neurolink combos. Mystic and Herald are absolutely needed since this deck likes to take it slow, and not punch stuff with face early game unless necessary.
To conclude, it’s a super versatile, fun and borderline cancerous build which (un)fortunately is shut down pretty hard by swarm and provoke. A better player would surely achieve some decent results with this thing
Wr was 10-6 (63 %) this season Gold/Silver and last season Diamond.
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I like this deck even though it seems a bit too wierd (in a good way) for me. I’ve got a few questions;
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How much do you rely on Autarch’s Gifts?
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Did you ever manage to make use of Reliquarian?
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You mention using exhuming sand, but have no ways to produce it in your deck. Do you rely on pulling Oblivion Sickle from Skyppy/Grincher/Gifts to make it?
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Yeah, weird decks are my speciality! Here are your answers:
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A lot. It’s the main thing to play on the turn after NoSE.
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Twice, but it’s not super good here. I just like the card so wanted to include it
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Yep, but Gifts pulls it pretty often (around once every 4 games). Mainly good to know that a swarm gameplan is also possible with this deck. Thunderclap also works well for this purpose.
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I’ve tried reliq with dustdrinker for some intensifies shenanigans, but i think this might work too.
However i might switch reliq with ankh (cause that’s my fav artifact in the game) in my version and see how it goes from there.
Aside from that i just want to say thanks for making all these off meta, weird, memey decks idea dude.
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Accumulo-bumpus!
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Accumulo-bumpus!
Accumulo-bumpus!
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Nice bump! 
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The second one is intensified, I guess.
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Indeed it is
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KoP II: Gotta Poop Fast!
So, here’s the piece of cancer I’ve been using every now and then for laddering during the past few weeks. The basic idea is so simple even a monkey could grasp it: we gotta poop, and we gotta poop it fast! So take a good, comfortable posture on your toilet seat, play out your Celebrants, Manaforgers and Abjudicators and get ready for the “real deal”.
Turn 3 Fault is the basic goal, while occasional turn 2 Faults can also be done with Manaforgers if you opponent becomes careless. Once Gate to the Poopvault opens, we hide in a convenient remote spot of the board and commence endless pooping while playing out golems, Abjudicators, Sandswirls, Khakas and occasional removal.
Wr was 12-3 (80 %) in Diamond & Gold.
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You’re a monster 
I built almost the exact same deck a while back (the only difference being a playset of Oasis instead of Decay), but couldn’t bring myself to actually play it.
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A new bump emerges…
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