So here is my submission for the Jan 2017 contest. Would really appreciate discussion to see how the community evaluates it.
Essence of Pyrae
Vetruvian Spell
4 mana
Deal damage equal to the target’s attack to everything else in the same row.
Fan Card Design Hub: Discussion (+Card Design Contest Discussion)
1 Like
Idea for the card design contest:
Vanguard’s Honor
3 Mana Lyonar Spell
Give a Minion +1/+3
Whenever this minion deals damage, move the damaged enemy back 1 space, if they cannot move back one space, deal two damage.
Basically a defensive buff to a minion that can disrupt the opponents positioning or allow you to break through their lines. Its secondary effect can also force your opponent to split their minions apart lest they take extra damage from attacks. It costs the same as Afterblaze, but it doesn’t buff as much in exchange for the added affect.
Edit: Didn’t realize it was only spells that counted.
Please feel free too tell me how my idea is stupid, childish, and will not work 
3 Likes
I think the contest requires the card to be a spell. Maybe a spell that grants a minion some stats and this ability?
1 Like
what do you think of this card for my submission?
Soul Resonance
3 mana
abyssian spell
double the health and attack for each identical minion nearby each other for this turn
this is obviously used for swarm and wraithling synergy, but can be used when there are multiple healing mystics or in mirror matches (for example, both sides play a healing mystic and you walk yours over, cast this, and both are now 4/6’s). best used if there is something like the enemies face in range for smacking, or clearing as the health buff drops at the end of the turn and the damage stays the same.
still undecided on mana cost, duration, and if health should be increased.
i think it would work better as an artifact, but this contest only allows spell cards.
also @readerusmc, the contest rules state that you cant create any new keywords
2 Likes
First: Does this apply to all the other buffs on a card ie. A 7/7 Wraith is next to a 1/1 wraith do the two wraiths become 14/14 and 2/2 respectively?
Second: Is this exponential? Where if you have one wraith surrounded by 3 wraiths, does it’s attack and health go up by 8* or by 2*. If it’s the former, then it’s easily abused for exceedingly early kills, and if it’s the latter, then it is essentially a more impractical Blood Baronette.
Also, while the card is fun, it is outclassed by most of the other 3 mana buff spells, for example: Void Steal keeps pace, and decreases the enemy attack as well. Not to mention, that you need to A) Have two Wraiths next to each other and B) Have Played a buff spell on at least one of the Wraiths for this to be more useful than just playing two buff spells
Anyways, that’s my thoughts. I personally like the idea, but just don’t think it’ll be viable.
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Just curious to see your oppinions and suggestions on my submission
Could I rephrase some part of the text to make it easier to understand?
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Posting this here so I have a copy of it on the forums.
I would like opinions on the design premise.
I’ve already withdrawn it from the contest.
Spell: Divergence
Vetruvian
4 Mana
Summon two images of your general nearby. Keyword: Mirage
Keyword: Mirage Shuffle your general, and any images, to random tiles at the end of your turn. Images deal no damage, move normally, have visible stats equal to the general at summoning, and die in one instance of being targeted. Images are immune to AOE damage.
I designed this card to attempt some indirect protection for Vetruvian. Solving the general is the name of the game. This gives Vetruvian a small way to attempt a shell game, as it were. I compared to Lyonar’s general replacement with the cost/effect. I went with AOE immunity simply due to Vetruvian having really good value minions. Opponents will need to decide which threats they wish to deal with. Vetruvian doesn’t currently have a way to deal with minions at range(out of hand damage, dispel, removal). This could even the odds while adding a bit more strategy to the game.
1 Like
Unfortunately, we can’t make keywords 
The wording seems a bit confusing… Maybe just have it so that it summons two mirages that must be hit before they can hit your general
1 Like
I don’t want the images being simply “hit”. That’s far too easy. They need to be targeted. This forces the opponent to actively decide which of the 3 to target. You have a 67% chance to “waste” any targeted ability or spell. It would remove the image and fizzle. Then you’re only left with a 50% chance.
@johnbob78 I’d be happy to clarify the wording for you. Which part has you confused?
1 Like
Alright, time to give my initial thought towards some of the designs so far. I really liked a lot of ideas that were given this early in the competition 
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owilington
@owlington I like the concept of the card, plays into the theme of the keyword blast in Vetruvian and acts as a decent form of ranged removal that punishes offensive minions. Also has great punish synergy with Star’s Fury, and at 4 mana it will be difficult for the player to develop anything with the spell.
johnbob78
@johnbob78 I like the idea of being able to push back an enemy when attacking, although the mana cost and stats given could be reworked
oranos
@oranos This may seem a bit nitpicky, but I really like the parallelism with your design in conjunction with other Abyssian cards, as the most noticable single target minion buffs (Deathfire Crescendo, Shadow Reflection, Void Steal, Blood Baronette) are all in the 3 mana slot like Soul Resonance, so props for that! This is yet another indirect win condition for swarm decks by rewarding massive number of wraithlings, and can be used on non wraithling minions as well. The wording of the effect could be reworded, but I overall love the stronger united theme in the card through the positioning requirement. Also love the Soul Eater reference 
genkei
@genkei While I can somewhat understand the card’s effect (with it’s maximum cost being 1???) and rewarding infiltrate/being on your opponent’s side of the field, the wording seems a bit off, and I’m afraid that the effect could be too much of a snowball. Maybe consider limiting the effect to minions on your starting side of the field, and having the cost of the spell be halved on your opponent’s side of the field?
readerusmc
@readerusmc While I like the concept, you cannot create new keywords in this expansion (Mirage in this case). Maybe try to incorporate the concept without establishing a new keyword?
narasimha
@narasimha This is a really great idea that I like to see; a win condition for (specifically Argeon) outside of Tiger/Zoo and Divine Bond. It’s effect plays both on the zeal theme and the extension of movement via celerity, and the double damage taken aspect prevents minions like Windblade Adept from abusing the buff, focusing on the idea of increasing your minions health or increase their attack through cards like Sunset Dragoon (I think that’s the name?) Auryan Nexus, War Surge, and Skywind Glaives (due to zeal requirements) while also focusing on establishing a strong board. Also important to note it’s synergy with Afterblaze (although it loses zeal at the end of the turn, how will that interaction work?), but overall great card design.
Envest
@Envest Your design is very similar to @owlington 's, which may lose you points in creativity (since he was the first in the submission thread to submit a blast-like removal effect). May be something to consider with your design.
thebravetoaster
@thebravetoaster I like this card design, because it gives dispelled obelysk a use (such as Stone to Spears), but in a way that addresses removal. It does not exactly deal with ranged threats, but being able to give obelysks a use before they’re about to die or when dispelled is great in my opinion
2 Likes
the card applies to other buffs, though the word “identical” could be used as a limiting factor requiring the same damage and buffs and all around make the card useless but i dont want it to come to that
the card is exponential so a wraithling surrounded by a lot of wraithlings would get super buff, but remember that it lasts for only one turn and after that it returns to a 1/1, likely dying due to the damage from counterattacks. (also you got former and latter mixed up). i did keep blood baronette in mind for this purpose. it would actually make the “wraithling” decks a meta deck instead of a meme deck.
also, although it is easiest to trigger with wraithlings, especially for multiple triggers, unless your wraithling is buffed or you have a lot of them right next to each other the card is not gonna do a whole lot of damage. i worded it so that the card can work (albiet unreliably) without wraithlings. healing mystic is the easy example since its everywhere. even prismatic illusionist and black locust would be really good for this card. extra care is required when using the card cause it could actually buff your opponents minions and backfire on you.
i am still debating whether to make it a 4 or even 5 mana card due to its strong burst potential, but i feel the restrictions and set up required make up for it.
@akurane you have to add an extra line between your regular text and the start of the hide details tab or it doesnt work. i had to learn this the hard way
1 Like
Thanks for the tip!
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What’s the least or worst played archetype? I’m assuming whatever it is comes from Vetruvian.
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well, if i put this card in vet, it would be blatently OP with stars fury and obelysks.
also, i changed it to be less blatently OP in general
Soul Resonance
3 mana
Abyssian spell
all minions gain the attack and health of nearby minions with the same name until the end of your turn
2 Likes
another month another contest and would like feedback on my submission. :>
Forboading Steps
Abyssian Spell
3 mana
Give a friendly minion or your General Deathwatch: +1 movement, resets each turn
1 Like
Thank you for the comment, I will try and rephrase it so its easily understood. The spells maximum cost is 8, the minimum is 1. I think you made a typo or misread a part of it so ill clarify, the card costs less the further you are from the starting point (cointing columns not tiles) and the effect hits everything behind your general (not row behind your general but columns behind your general), making the spell more powerfull the further you are from your starting tile. Basically, the further you are from your starting column the cheaper and more potent the card becomes.
Your suggestion is worth considering, and I will do just that, but I do have to point out that current version allows for more diversity of situations, for instance, if the effect worked only on your starting side of the field and the cost was reduced only in infiltrate zone, there would only be one scenario in which the card was worth playing, namely when you are infiltrating and opponent positioned badly. With the current version of effect (cost ranging from 8 to 1, and columns hit from 0 to 8) theres a potential for this card to be played for 5 mana and generate more value than it would for 2. This version simply creates a spectrum of case to case scenarios in which you are actually considering playing the card, and allows your opponent diversity of options for counterplay (instead of playing around Avalnache like card, he could addapt Counter strategies similar, but not the same, to playing around backstab).
Im not trying to deffend the current version, Im just trying to illustrate the differences between the two possible versions, as well as clarify how exactly the card works because I know the wording is confusing but thats the best (most precise) version I could come up with.
Can I ask you a favor? If you are willing, could you re-read the card, without the additional information found under explanation and design, and tell me how you think the card works and what makes you think that way. This would really help me pinpoint what and how to change the text so its easily umderstood on the first read.
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Sooo, uhh. Huh, this is hard…
Eh, I’m too tired, Ill come up with something later.
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Would love for you to do another round of reviews (if possible)! Thanks!
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considering how cheap movement spells are, i think your card is actually overpriced, especially in abyss (any other faction would KILL for this card) where there arent a whole lot of good targets (besides the general). remember, there is a 3 mana card that gives a minion deathwatch +2/2 permanently.
consider making it look a bit more like this
foreboding steps
2 mana
abyssian spell
give a friendly minion or general “deathwatch: +1 movement until the end of your turn”
1 Like
The card reads like you describe it (tiles and columns away from your starting point are the same, although I think columns are more specific and easier to understand in the context). I also understand the variety aspect; I believe my initial worries were due to the potential of a complete board wipe at 5 mana (silhouette tracer+your spell) although even then that combo send a bit awkward. Just some food for thought.
Also, @RyanH I plan on doing another review today around 2pm est.
2 Likes